Disease Tourism: Expand Your Horizons & Your Antibodies

Travelers come in many different types. You could be the thrill-seeking adreniline traveler. You could be a wild backpacking party chaser. You could be a humble, obedient Instagram husband. But there’s a new type of traveler on the block, and you may have already noticed them from their inquisitive sniffling, adventurous full-body rashes, and inspiringly swollen brains.

That’s right, disease tourism is really starting to gain momentum. And in a sense, these brave bacterial explorers are the truest travelers out there. Sure you can scrape the surface of a destination and only see the tourist hotspots, the local culture, or the look on children’s faces when you volunteer and change their lives forever. Or you can break out of your vaccinated comfort zone and experience everything a place has to offer, fever dreams, internal hemorrhaging and all.

Not to mention, if you keep a closed mind and a closed immune system, you limit yourself from seeing much of the world. Most travelers will avoid entire parts of the planet for fear of contracting a dangerous virus, but that worry goes out the quarantine ward window when it’s the whole purpose of your trip. That’s why this new hot (zone) travel trend has led to a tourism boom in previously untouched locales.

Always wanted to visit West Africa, but have concerns over Ebola? Maybe instead you should concern yourself with which bodily fluid you find most appetizing. Always wanted to explore the rainforest, but would rather avoid malaria? Maybe instead you should check the privilege of your cushy, healthy life and walk around the Amazon naked slathered in honey. Always dreamed of spending time in Sydney but worried you’d contract alcoholism and chronic barfighting? Maybe instead this round’s on you and don’t fuckin look at me like that mate.

Vaccines are wackcines. Don’t get airborne. Get airborne contagions. The world is your petri dish, and if you spend some time with virus vacationers, you might just see the light. The one in the corner of your eye that won’t go away and gets brighter day by day. Give disease tourism a try, it’s infectious.